Joyfully Yours

Stress and the little black sheep

I wish I had a soundproof room ... so I can scream as loud and as long as I want without freaking out my neighbors.  I'm going to have to add that to my list of things to do in my new house.  Any contractors out there reading this blog that wanna give me a good deal?

Mom has been staying with me since October 26th ... she finally goes home on the 21st.  I swear I've gotten more wrinkles and white hairs since she's been here than during my divorce.  Mom and I have never gotten along well.  I was Daddy's Little Girl, and she openly resented that.  I got to the point where I would never talk to her, because no matter what I said or did, it wasn't good enough for her.  As I grew up, moved out, and had children, our relationship never really changed.  Then Dad passed away in June 2000, and with my subsequent divorce, I moved here to Wisconsin in August 2002.  I do send the obligatory birthday/mother's day/Christmas card, but other than that, we never really talked to each other.  Not that I wouldn't try, but within 2 minutes of my calling her, she'd start in with the critcism/nagging.  And it got to the point that I figured why bother?

Suffice it to say, I was shocked when she called up to say she was coming to visit me.  And she was staying for three entire months.  It's been rough, but had it's good times too.  I'm just ready for her to go back home, and resume our normal non-talking, half-of-the-continental-United-States-and-entire-Pacific-Ocean-between-us relationship.  I love her, I really do, but we just aren't meant to live together.

I am a divorced mom, with 2 children, and I work full-time.  When I get home from work, all I want to do is be with my kids, have a good dinner, put them to bed, then relax on my couch.  Since she's been here, it's complete mayhem.  She doesn't limit her nagging just to me, the minute my kids walk into MY house, she starts picking at them, then they get crabby, I get crabby, and there goes my whole day.  The minute I get them settled (after dinner, homework, a bath and one-on-one time) and sit down to relax, she starts in on me all over again.  What I'm doing wrong.  What my kids are doing wrong.  How I should do this, that, everything under the sun.  I can barely take much more of it.

My closest relative is Dad's brother in Texas, whom I've only met once in my entire life.  My brothers and sisters in Hawaii with Mom.  I guess you could say I've always been the black sheep of the family.  Which is very weird, because I'm the only one that got good grades, did my chores, and complied with my parent's rules.   But I always knew that if and when Dad died, that would be "it" for me and my family. 

I hate to air dirty laundry, but it's been a loooooooong and trying time with Mom here, and I'm just so happy that it's coming to an end.  I feel rather guilty for feeling this way, especially when the kids give each other high five's when they countdown the days 'til gramma's gone.

So I'm gonna sit here, listen to Come Away With Me by Norah Jones, sip my Diet Coke with Malibu, and surf blogs at Blog Explosion.  7 days left ...

Little hula girl

We had dinner with Noreen, Rob and kids, and Rob's parents tonite.  Noreen's a kumu hula, and teaches hula to a group of college-aged girls.  They perform around the state, and are really good.  Noreen took a break after Seth was born, but told me tonite that she's ready to teach again, but will do children this time.  There are already 4 girls aged 4 - 6 that are interested in dancing, and my son wants to learn too.  Rob and Vaha, another friend, dance the men's samoan dance, and Vaha also does the fire dance, so it'll be cool for them to have a younger boy to dance with them.  As my children are of Hawaiian, Samoan, Filipino, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, German, and Irish descent (no kidding - you should see their birth certificates!), I like to teach them the cultures of each of their heritage.  I also want to have my daughter take Irish Dance and Ballet classes.  She loves to dance, so I think she'll enjoy all three.

I'm #2!

I can't believe it!  I'm #2 on the Blog Explosion Personal Diary directory!  Unbelievable!  I'm pretty excited! :)  If you've never heard of Blog Explosion before, it's a very cool blog promotion site - you join (for free), enter your blog info, and start surfing blogs.  For every two blogs you visit, someone will come and visit yours! 

I joined Blog Explosion about a year ago, and have really seen my blog traffic grow.  I've also discovered really great blogs that I enjoy reading on a daily basis thanks to Blog Explosion!  So what are you waiting for, go check it out!

Fuzzy Little Caterpillar

I haven't shaped my eybrows since December 9th.  Kinda gross I know, but at least it isn't a unibrow yet.  Not that I plan to let it get that far, it's just that, you see, once I start to shape my eyebrows, I keep going and going, and before you know it, I've gone too far.  Which is exactly what happened on December 9th. 

I finally threw out all of the tweezers in my house, and have resigned myself to never, ever, shaping my eyebrows on my own again.  Which is not exactly a wrong thing, because now I have an excuse to go to the day spa every two weeks to get beautified!  :)   

Being a homeowner ...

... is a lot of work, especially when the seller leaves behind tons of crap stuff.  Our first week here, I put out 24 large garbage bags full of their crap stuff.  The second week, 6 large garbage bags, 14 empty paint cans, and rusty/corroded/gross tools and lawn stuff.  This week is a bit better, 4 large garbage bags, 2 broken milk crates, a broken reclining beach chair, a cobb-webby wooden crate, and a pair of wooden crutches.

I have to hire the Junk Squad to haul the rest of the crap stuff away next weekend:  another rusty/corroded/gross work bench, an old, large, broken entertainment center, another broken table, and an assortment of plywood, old linoleum, and moth-eaten carpeting.  Then, I have a slew of Freecycle-ers coming to pick up things that I didn't want to keep, but thought were too good to throw away:  gardening items, painting supplies, candle votives, a computer desk, and a few select pieces of plywood.

I've finally gotten over most of my irritation with the previous owners ... it should definitely get better once all their crap stuff is finally gone. 

LOST

Hello, my name is mizchelle and I'm addicted to LOST. *LOL*  As always, I enjoyedtonite's show.  I love how they flashback to a certain character's past, to show you how they came to be the person they are now. 

My main focus on Thursdays after watching LOST is to log onto the message boards and read all the complaints, conspriacy theories, and spoilers.  A few folks at work watch it, so we're always discussing it Thursday morning in the kitchen. 

Countdown to WW

Noreen and I have decided to do Weight Watchers together.  I wanted to start this week, but thought I could use the extra time to clean out my cupboards and get organized so we've set the 19th as our start date.  My job offered WW at Work last year, and I did okay.  I wasn't "ready" for it, so I wasn't as committed as I should have been.  I'm ready to do this now, though, and can't wait to begin!

We have an electrician coming today to install outlets in the basement.  And I'll be busy tearing down shelves and getting the previous owner's crap stuff out of there this weekend.  We have a lot of space down there, so I'm going to set up an area for my workouts.  I bought rubber mats from Sam's Club to cushion the floor (so I'm not doing cardio on the concrete floor), and the treadmill is begging to be used.  I'm also going to break down and buy a full length mirror - I haven't had one since I lived with my parents.  I just don't like looking at myself *LOL* but I think having one will force me to see what I don't want to see, and keep me on the right track.  The one thing I will not buy is a scale.  I will get obsessive about it.  I'll stick to weighing in at meetings, and go by how my clothes fit.

Ahhh ... clothes!  I simply can't wait to start buying and wearing pretty clothes again.  The thought of being comfortable in a bathing suit ... pure nirvana!

The Biggest Loser

6I just joined an online Biggest Loser challenge, and I'm ready and raring to go!  My Jillian Michaels DVDs (Shape Up Complete, Maximize Complete, and Cardio Kick Box) came in last week, and my Gunnar Peterson Core Secrets DVD and ball came in today.  I'm going to start previewing them this week, so I know what I'm getting myself into *LOL*

Mom goes back to Hawaii on January 21st, then it'll be time to purge the house of junk foods once and for all.  The kids don't mind too much, if it's in the house, they'll eat it.  But they don't complain if it isn't there, they enjoy fruits and raw veggies as snacks too.

The challenge officially starts on February 1st and runs for 3 months.  My goal is to lose 20 lbs, which is definitely doable.  Between my new DVDs and my new-to-me treadmill, I've got the workouts all planned out.  The eating will be a bit harder, getting into a routine will definitely help.  I plan to make weekly meal plans, and do all the shopping and prep work on Sundays, to streamline the process during the week.  I usually get home from work by 5:15, which is 45 minutes earlier than I used to at our old house, so I have more than enough time to cook a healthy meal.  As always, it's easier said than done!

On a different note, I find myself thinking more and more often about a male acquaintance of mine.  It's an interesting situation, my boss, well, not really my boss, I'm her assistant, anyway, she used to date this guy last year, then broke up with him for reasons left unsaid.  They remained friends, and last fall, she suggested to him that he become a Big Brother to my son.  He's a high school teacher and boy's basketball coach, and all in all a really good guy.  He's taken my son out on several occaisions since then, and we've started emailing each other once a week or so.  I find myself attracted to him, but always get a weird feeling because he used to date my "boss" who's also turned into a good friend.  She's moved on and is serious about someone else, and I know she won't mind my going out with him, I've always suspected that she intended all along for us to get together, but I don't know.  I've never crossed that line and gone out with a friend's ex.  We're all supposedly adults now though, so does that rule still apply?  I'm confused!

Overcoming Bitterness

Today's message at church was overcoming bitterness.  Bitterness over something that someone has done to you.  [more to come soon]

Chicago ... my kind of town!

We caught the Metra into Chicago this morning.  It was an hour drive to Kenosha station, then 28 stops and 2 hours later, we were there! 

We walked to the Sears Tower first.  After an interesting short documentary, we caught a super fast elevator to the 99th floor.  It was a bit cloudy, but we still got to see quite a distance away.  Apparently, on a clear day, you can see Indiana, Iowa, Missouri, and Wisconsin!  There was just one elevator working today, so they made us ride down in the freight elevator.  I was tempted to ask for a refund (they charge $12 for adults and $8 for children), but my mom said not to make a fuss.

Next was lunch at Marquette's Diner.  The service was lacking, and the food uninspiring.  Needless to say, none of us finished our entrees, and we were still hungry when we left.

We tried to wait for a trolley to take us to Navy Pier, but realized they stopped running on January 1st, so we hopped in a cab, and $10 later, we were there.  We strolled through the Chicago's Children Museum and Smith Museum of Stained Glass Windows.  I love stained glass windows, and couldn't get enough of them! 

Of course, we just had to ride the Ferris Wheel!  I suddenly found myself with a severe fear of heights, despite just having come from the Sears Tower!  I think it was being in a cage, 200 feet above the ground, with the wind whipping around me that really made it scary.  I was really happy to get back to the bottom.

We stopped for ice cream, then hopped back onto a cab to Union Station.  We had about a hour to kill before our train left, so we did some shopping, and had yet another snack at Jamba Juice.  Finally it was time to hop on the train, and 3 hours later, we arrived at home.  We didn't do nearly as much as I wanted to, but my mom and the kids are rather short on patience and attention spans, so they were ready to go.

The kids napped on the train, so they're not about to sleep soon, but I'm tired and heading to bed!